


Taboo

by GlimmerySKZ



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Bottom Kim Seungmin, Brother/Brother Incest, Brothers, Kim Seungmin is Whipped, Lee Minho | Lee Know is Whipped, M/M, Sibling Incest, Smut, Taboo, Top Lee Minho | Lee Know, Web Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:34:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24818461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GlimmerySKZ/pseuds/GlimmerySKZ
Summary: “Hi, I’m Sky. I’m a little shy, but I’ll be naughty if you can court me.”
Relationships: Kim Seungmin/Lee Minho | Lee Know
Kudos: 261





	1. I See You

**Author's Note:**

> Russian translation of Taboo: https://ficbook.net/readfic/9714487

Today is no different from the ordinary. Seungmin wakes up early and takes a morning shower, dresses himself, eats breakfast and puts on his shoes. 

His eyes are still a little unfocused as he fixes the collar on his uniform, and just then, his older brother deems it a worthy time to wake up as he procrastinate into the kitchen to grab a sleazy piece of half prepared toast, standing with an unruly uniform on, disheveled hair and sleepy eyes.

Seungmin keeps his gaze down, and ignores Minho when he says good morning. The older brushes past Seungmin to sit at the table to eat his toast as he scrolls down twitter on his phone, used to the absence of his younger brother.

It's not that Minho has done anything wrong, to be honest. It’s just how it has always been, ever since they became teenagers and puberty took its toll.

However, the problem lies with the younger brother, rather than with the older. Seungmin has a grudge against Minho, and there is no real reason for it other than his wounded pride along with the green monster that resides within him.

He is not one who is prone to display or feel jealousy, however, all sorts of annoyed feelings, including the sixth sin, envy, rages on within him whenever his sibling is near or is mentioned.

It's always Minho here, Minho there. Their parents spoil their nineteen-year-old star born miracle with whatever they can muster, while Seungmin, the one who is younger by a mere year, always gets what is second best.

Seungmin is not aware of when it started, but it must have been when they grew older and Minho began to dance; started to become a wonderful performer with a great stage presence, which automatically granted him many benefits in different aspects. Minho can be very charismatic and shy in just the right way when they are out to gather at family meetings, and has always been the favorite child, the favorite cousin. With his early puberty and growth, his smile, sincere but naughty and at times reserved personality, and adorable wit, nothing has possibly gone wrong for him throughout the years, aside from the usual high school drama. Even in his first year of high school, he is crowned prom king; and in his second year, the girls and boys are still doting on him from afar, and his grades have always been passable.

Then there is Seungmin, the one standing in the shadow of his perfect big brother. The secondary sibling. Don’t get him wrong, he is not ugly. But he is not amazingly handsome either, he is just average. He has the average shoulders regarding width, the average body and the average hobbies. 

He has been told he has a pretty face and that he sings well, but he mostly focuses on wanting to become an actor or someone who performs in musicals. Even that brings nothing but a _‘that’s good dear’_ from his parents, while Minho gets the _‘We are so proud of you’_ every time he talks about having to learn new choreography.

Seungmin is known for passing with good grades, and for having a talent regarding singing, but that changes nothing. For some reason, his lack of social skills push the popularity away and all he can do is to fidget in the background as Minho can parade with the usual. Minho is the one who gets invited to the big parties, goes out drinking too often and gets attention from other individuals, while Seungmin stays at home to do his homework, goes to karaoke bars with his friends as a highlight and spends too much time alone in music stores.

It’s not that Seungmin doesn't have great friends; and even he parties as well and goes around every now and then, but Minho still has a bigger social circle, he always just knows what to say; and he is so good at wrapping everyone around his pinky finger, even if he does not intend to do so.

The worst thing about all of it is that Minho treats Seungmin good, praises him for everything he does, calls him cute nicknames and says he admires him, and is the one who asks about the acting, the musicals and singing practice rather than their parents. Seungmin has absolutely no reason to hate his brother, but he holds his pride and temper too dear, and now it is too late to change his demeanor, to back out and apologize for the silent treatment that started a long time ago.

They used to be attached by the hips, did everything together and were soul brothers as they used to say. It changed once puberty knocked the front door down and deemed itself welcome. Seungmin regrets his behavior, but he is too ashamed to put an end to it, even if it only makes him sound even more foul. 

So he barely spares Minho a glance when the latter says “Have a good day in school, Min” 

Seungmin sighs and pretends he hears nothing, leaning down to tie his shoes, scruffy bangs shading his eyes, though his heart is clenching within his chest and he wishes he could just get over himself already.

******

It's late when Seungmin gets home from his shift at the supermarket. His mom is already home, about to shop groceries and prepare food. He greets her with a muttered _‘Hey mom’_ before disappearing up in his room, throwing his bag on the floor to flump down on his bed, heaving up a sigh. He groans loudly and kicks the air, tired of so much, even though he knows he should be grateful for many things. 

He stares up at the ceiling, puffing his cheeks before he raises himself and drags his laptop out of the bag where it miserably lies on the floor, hoping he hasn’t damaged it as he has done before from his antics. He starts the computer and waits for it to turn on, running a hand through his hair as he settles on his bed, back against the wall. He dawdles a little around on twitter, but settles at last to play a game since he has already done the readings for today.

After a while, the course changes, and he logs onto an anonymous hotline site he has been a member of for some months. It’s a side for teenagers with sexuality crises, as some tend to say, but Seungmin knows he has always swung the other way, even his former girlfriend found out when Seungmin seemed disinterested in kissing and in having sex, or in the whole relationship for that matter. It was a tough period and a decisive moment of truth to Seungmin, at least.

However, most people on the mentioned site only use it to jerk off to each other, rather than to date and discuss. Seungmin has been in chat rooms where he has seen other guys masturbate on live camera while viewers have commented and observed the process.

He has never really tried to do a show himself, and only tried to do private cam chat with a few random dudes, but nothing more than that. It's nothing that has caught him the right way so far, though he likes the idea and enjoys the attention he can get from the guys on the site, and he admits he’s been more active as of lately.

His profile contains minimal information about himself, only the words: “ **Hi, I’m Sky. I’m a little shy, but I’ll be naughty if you can court me.** ”

The only apparent thing that is presented are pictures of him lying on his stomach in the bed; his buttocks, back and skin in view as he lies there with his ankles crossed; no face in view but a little part of the back of his head.

Another picture is of him sitting with spread legs while he wears black boxers that works as a great contrast to his pale skin. It is where he sits on his shins, baring his thighs while displaying his hard on beneath the material, along with the display of the barely visible abs on his stomach and his hard nippless; still no face in view.

He is secretly proud to say that he has attracted many interested guys ever since he started posting pictures of his body. Yet the only guy who seems to interest him though is one he has been chatting with for months, one who joined a little earlier than him that he has met through a random chat. Seungmin might not be the most sought man around due to his fidgetiness; his serious face expressions and quiet demeanor, but he is desired on the internet, and that is not so bad.

The job uniform scratches him the wrong way, so he lets the computer run in the background as he changes his clothes. He is too lazy to wear pants, so he settles to wear an oversized, striped shirt that has a framed quote on the middle saying ‘QT’, and since he considers doing a video chat tonight, he chooses just the one that dips a little low on his collarbones to display them and show some more skin. Beneath it, he wears a pair of boxers like the ones in his pictures.

He jolts slightly when a familiar ping emerges from the computer, announcing that he has gotten a message on the line. Seungmin blinks and bites his lips, biting the lower one in anticipation as he takes a seat on the bed and looks at the screen.

He grins goofily to himself when he sees the name of the sender; a popup notification with the username Lee Know. He enters the private chat room without hesitating.

**Lee Know:** Hey pretty thing

Seungmin grins to himself and arranges his seat for better comfort. Lee Know is the only one he has remained in contact with for more than a week on the site, but is also the only one who can make something in his gut twist with warmth and make his heart flutter, even though it is all anonymous and virtual.

Lee Know claims to be nineteen and has a moody personality, but is sincere and somewhat good at leading the conversations in many places, has a natural way of chatting and knows how to keep it going. He likes physical activities and has, as shown in some of his pictures, a toned and slightly tanned body, much to Seungmin's liking.

They usually talk about random things, about movies and complain about life to each other. The funny thing is that the both of them have a brother complex. Lee Know wants to get closer to his brother but his brother pushes him away, while Seungmin lives with a goody-two over-all perfect sibling who he cannot get close to either due to his miffed pride and stubborn reluctance, even if he might want to.

Lee Know even once said: _'man if I had a perfect brother who shaded everything about myself I'd be pretty pissed too'_ , and Seungmin had laughed and immediately taken a liking to him, resulting that they quickly became friends.

**Sky:** Hey there, hot stuff.

_Lee Know is replying…_

Seungmin leans back and feels warm in his stomach. It might be dangerous to feel like this for someone he has never met, but he is not sure if he can help it. Behind the screen, Lee Know might be some old man with dark intentions. They have never video chatted before, so Seungmin doesn't even know if the latter is true to his pictures and given identity.

**Lee Know:** whatcha doin'?

**Sky:** Just got home. I'm so tired.

**Lee Know:** Is your brother being too perfect again??

**Sky:** Thought I told you already. I'm just an undercover mean girl prone to jealousy in that aspect, tbh.

**Lee Know:** aww... you poor poor thing

**Sky:** Pity me TvT

**Lee Know:** sending u virtual feel-better hugs rn

**Sky:** Oh, romantic.

**Lee Know:** didn’t mean it to be but if you want it i’d send u kisses /wink wink

**Sky:** You don’t do smileys, do you?

**Lee Know:** doesn’t fit my super-hot image yanno

**Sky:** I'm dealing with a bad guy, aren't I?

**Lee Know:** can u at least sound like u believe it

**Sky:** Nah. you are like a sentimental kitty anyway.

Seungmin laughs to himself, a smile curved on his lips. Lee Know always makes his days so much better, and they sometimes end up writing until midnight.

**Lee Know:** wow idk if i should feel super insulted or super duper flattered

**Sky:** What do you think?

**Lee Know:** i think i should prove to u that I'm not as adorable as you might think.

Something clenches in Seungmin’s stomach and he jitters a bit, another kind of smile appearing on his lips. They have sometimes talked about doing a webcam session before, maybe just to see whether the other one is a faker or not. Lee Know seems eager tonight.

**Sky:** What're you suggesting, bad boy?

**Lee Know:** are you mocking me..

**Sky:** Wouldn't dream of it.

**Lee Know:** what i'd do to wipe that smirk off your face

Seungmin bites his lower lip and smiles into the bend of his arm, feeling warm beneath his boxers. It is almost ridiculous how Lee Know can affect him, even if he is only a figure in the back of Seungmin's mind, probably halfway across the continent.

**Sky:** What would you do?

**Lee Know:** don't think you want to know

Seungmin wets his lips and grants his door a glance. He waddles over and quickly locks it, just in case; quick to run back to answer.

**Sky:** Try me.

**Lee Know:** you are a fucking tease, Sky

**Sky:** Tease is my middle name.

**Lee Know:** bet you wouldn't be so cocky if i was there, though

**Sky:** Really.

**Lee Know:** mmhmmm.

**Sky:** Sounds like you are thirsty

**Lee Know:** I am.

**Lee Know:** thought about you all day. couldn't wait to come home to talk to you.

Seungmin feels his insides heat up and he is seconds away from screaming into his pillow. Lee Know is prone to say all kinds of lewd stuff, but the truth is that he is the one who tends to rile Seungmin up with dirty talk and then draws away with a smiley face, those he only uses when he wants to be a prankster, leaving Seungmin all bothered.

**Lee Know:** you there?

**Sky:** You are not being fair.

**Lee Know:** awww someone's getting a little hot there am i right?

**Sky:** Shut up.

**Lee Know:** love it when you get flustered.

**Sky:** Well I don't.

**Lee Know:** can’t help it, Sky. you are on my mind 24/7.

Seungmin contemplates what to say. He has only been led into dirty talk a few couple of times but was interrupted each time by dinnertime or something else. He thinks it would be fun to surprise Lee Know tonight.

**Sky:** I thought about you last night.

_Lee Know is replying…_

_…_

_Lee Know is replying…_

_…_

This time, Lee Know is the one whose answer is late, obviously considering what to write as the text keeps reappearing.

**Lee Know:** really? was i drinking tea with your plush animals and your hot brother?

Seungmin snorts.

**Sky:** No.

**Lee Know:** then what?

**Sky:** I don't know if I should tell you.

**Lee Know:** tell me

**Sky:** What if I don’t want to?

**Lee Know:** you have to

**Lee Know:** i demand it

**Sky:** It’s embarrassing.

**Lee Know:** tell me

Seungmin takes a deep breath and ruffles his hair. He feels warm in his gut just from the image he has in his head.

**Sky:** I touched myself to the thought of you.

**Sky:** While I did it, I imagined it was you doing it to me.

**Sky:** You stretched me open and fucked me on my bed while my parents were just downstairs.

**Sky:** muffling me by gagging my mouth with my own shirt.

**Sky:** You called me yours and fucked me so hard I started crying, and I thought your cock was so big and so good inside of me.

Seungmin’s cheeks are beyond the warmth of the sun as he writes, and he has only planned to write one sentence, but his fingers just keep moving because the images are stuck in his head, and has haunted him ever since he started writing with Lee Know.

It’s first when he has stopped typing he realizes just what it is he has said, and he has always been too shy to really write such stuff, and even had to close a cam session with another dude because he had been so embarrassed by the dirty talk streaming from the man’s mouth. Seungmin is almost afraid if he might have crossed a line, and when Lee Know does not answer for a while, he considers taking it back, writing a: _"haha, jk!!"_

_Lee Know is replying...._

Seungmin swallows heavily and is not sure whether he is to look away or to wait and see the reply.

**Lee Know:** .... you make me so fucking horny all the time

**Lee Know:** you have no idea what i'd do to you if we ever met

Seungmin takes a sharp inhale and rearranges his seat. Lee Know will not know, will he? The warmth in his gut does not cease to grow but only continues, and he palms himself through his boxers, thinking of how Lee Know must be feeling right now.

**Lee Know:** are you touching yourself to the thought of me right now?

Seungmin flinches, almost embarrassed for being so easy to read, even if he has only refrained from answering for two minutes or less.

**Sky:** maybe

And there is the first clue to show something is out of the norm, because he is typing with shaky fingers and forgets to use a capital letter in the beginning.

**Lee Know:** I’m palming myself through my jeans right now, thinking of you and your beautiful thighs

**Lee Know:** bet it’d be heaven to have my face between them

**Lee Know:** sucking the skin till i make you beg for me to touch you

**Lee Know:** i'd fuck you with my tongue anytime, babe

A whimper eases through Seungmin’s lips and his boxers are straining, one hand hovering over his clothed arousal and the other over the keyboard. He sets the computer away and in front of himself instead of between his legs. He feels too impatient and he quickly slides the boxers off, easing back on the bed as he grabs his cock and slicks it with some of the pre cum leaking from the slit, swallowing heavily; he even forgets to reply as he leans back and bucks into his own hand, the words Lee Know has written imprinted on his mind. He only looks at the screen again when he has seen that Lee Know has typed some more.

**Lee Know:** you are not replying, Sky

**Lee Know:** i can just imagine you spread on your bed with your legs apart, because of me

**Lee Know:** am i right?

Seungmin feels his cheeks burn and he reaches one hand out, typing in a slow pace, tongue stuck out, other hand halting on his cock.

**Sky:** you are right

He is jutting his lower lip out, feeling even hotter beneath his skin when the next thing Lee Know types is,

**Lee Know:** you have a cam, right?

It takes a while before he writes the next sentences.

**Lee Know:** i want to see you touch yourself

**Lee Know:** would you do that for me?

Seungmin can feel his breath hitch, and he moves the cursor over the button that indulges a cam chat. His thighs are trembling and he feels adrenaline rush through his veins.

**Sky:** just wait a minute.

**Lee Know:** take your time

Seungmin stretches himself on the bed, leans over and opens his drawer to fumble around in it until he finds the bottle of lube hidden there. He arranges a pillow behind his back against the wall so that he will at least sit comfortably, and he is only wearing his striped, oversized blouse by now along with some black socks.

He checks the webcam and makes sure it sits low enough so that his face is not in view, only displaying his collarbones and a bit of his throat. He takes a deep breath and covers his cock with the shirt, drawing it down as he sits on his shins with his legs a little spread, thighs also hidden by the material.

**Sky:** would you like me to finger myself for you too?

He fidgets with the bottle of lube all the while, placing it next to himself just in case.

Lee Know’s reply is immediate.

**Lee Know:** please do

Seungmin takes a deep, deep inhale. He hovers the cursor over the icon again, and this time he clicks it, inching a little back on his knees, heart thumping violently against his ribcage. He has never felt this nervous before.

A phone emerges on the screen and it wriggles for some time before a swooping sound blares from the speakers, and two windows appear, one with Seungmin’s cam and one with Lee Know’s, alongside the chat window.

It is quiet between them, and Seungmin’s picture appears first, one where his white thighs look even paler on the screen due to the dim light in his room. He fidgets a little where he sits, biting his lower lip, one hand tugging down in his shirt to cover up, automatically displaying his collarbones and the start of his chest.

Lee Know’s cam glimmers for a few seconds too before an image appears. What meets Seungmin’s eyes is a broad chest and tan arms, and Lee Know is wearing a navy blue, snug t-shirt with a logo saying ‘supreme’ on it in a fancy scrawl. He looks just as promised. Seungmin can see his prominent adam's apple, how it bobs up and down as he swallows. All Seungmin wants right now is to see what hides beneath that shirt and down lower too.

The background is dark, because Lee Know seems to only have turned on a light by the desk that lights up a bit of the room including himself. He seems to sit by his desk, posture somewhat relaxed but veins are apparent on his arms and hands, and Seungmin can see how they move a bit as he writes something, a brief sound of keys being pressed down sounding from the other line.

**Lee Know:** you are gorgeous, Sky

Seungmin visibly tenses, squirming a bit as his toes curl and he arranges his seat again, one hand still pressing the shirt down as he leans forward and types with one hand, making sure not to lean too much down so that he does not put his face on show.

**Sky:** i’m nervous

He leans back again and Lee Know does not hesitate to answer.

**Lee Know:** don’t be

**Lee Know:** I'll guide you okay?

**Lee Know:** just lean back and read what i write

A shiver runs down Seungmin’s spine at the idea and he twirls the fabric in his other hand.

**Sky:** okay

**Sky:** are you turned on too

He leans back again, anticipation simmering beneath his skin. Lee Know chuckles at this, and through the line his voice is timbre and soft in a way that makes Seungmin wish he could hear it as a whisper in his ear, gut flaring with heat.

**Lee Know:** yeah

Lee Know writes, and he reaches a hand up to adjust the camera to turn it down, inching a little back on his chair and oh, oh okay.

Lee Know is wearing black jeans, but he has opened the fly and spread it apart, and his is not revealed but strains against the fabric of his wine red boxers, bulging out prominently. He’s so big, is the first thing Seungmin thinks, and he almost whimpers because he already wants to touch himself. If only the older was here.

Lee Know does not move the camera afterwards but lets it stay there, one hand palming himself through the underwear before typing again.

**Lee Know:** want to see you pretty boy

**Lee Know:** touch yourself for me

Seungmin does not reply but leans back, slumping onto his bottom instead of sitting on his shins, drawing his legs up to spread them apart, digging his heels into the soft mattress. He still has his shirt held in front of his crotch, and he does not think he has ever felt this embarrassed and turned on at the same time before. Lee Know seems to notice his nervousness though.

**Lee Know:** you are so gorgeous

**Lee Know:** your thighs look so fucking good

**Lee Know:** bet your dick is even prettier

**Lee Know:** lift the blouse a little higher so i can see

Seungmin makes a soft sound in the back of his throat he is sure even Lee Know must hear, even if it is muffled. He closes his eyes and lifts his shirt up, though his knees fight to clack together in the middle to hide himself. He keeps himself spread open though, revealing his cock, his balls and a bit of his buttocks, but he is not perched down enough to show his hole.

He can hear how Lee Know takes a breathy inhale.

**Lee Know:** yeah like that

Seungmin feels a boost of confidence and wills himself to spread himself further, breath shaky as he grabs his shaft and starts to stroke himself in a slow pace, a soft moan involuntarily sounding from his lips as his hips jerk a bit.

Lee Know makes a deep noise and Seungmin can see how he palms himself through his jeans with a firmer grasp now. Seungmin rises his shirt higher up, using one hand to keep it against his chest and the other one to jerk himself off as the pace heightens and he moves his hips a bit with the motions, soft noises escaping every now and then.

He likes the way he can see Lee Know’s shoulders tense, how he can hear the older breathe in and out heavily.

**Lee Know:** lift your shirt some more

**Lee Know:** touch your chest

**Lee Know:** think of me doing it to you

**Lee Know:** i’d kiss one of your nipples and pinch it between my teeth

Seungmin complies, drawing up in the shirt to reveal the pink nubs on his chest as he tweaks one between a thumb and forefinger, body automatically responding to the words Lee Know writes.

**Lee Know:** roll it between your fingers

Seungmin does, thumbing it as he does.

**Lee Know:** harder

He pinches it harder than before, whimpering when he does so, accidentally forgetting to touch his dick along the way.

**Lee Know:** don’t stop touching yourself

**Lee Know:** do it at the same time sweetie

Seungmin is puffing out hot breaths now, doing his best to focus on both parts of his body and on the text on the screen as well.

**Lee Know:** good

**Lee Know:** i want you to fuck yourself with your fingers now okay?

**Lee Know:** stretch yourself open first

**Lee Know:** spread your legs and let me see all of it

Seungmin’s hands are shaking as he lets go and fumbles to find the bottle of lube. He feels heat simmer everywhere, and it turns him on to have Lee Know write to him like this, he feels like anticipation is crowding and he would do anything to have Lee Know fuck him right now.

A little clumsily, he pops the cap open, lathering some fingers in the transparent liquid. He closes it again and puts it next to him, inching back to slump against the wall and the pillow, sliding a bit down just so that his chin and a bit of his mouth can be seen. His lips are agape as he lets out another soft moan since the lube is cold when he leads a hand between his legs. He guides his fingers down and rubs one fingertip over the puckered hole, lifting a bit in his legs so that the inner thighs clench when he traces the rim, all for Lee Know to see.

Lee Know mutters something close to a curse word, and he is still palming himself through his underwear. Seungmin takes a deep breath, gathering enough courage.

"Let me-" his voice is shy and soft, barely recognizable from the usual tone he uses.

"Let me see your cock," he whispers, biting his lower lip as his stomach cramps from the electric feeling coursing down his thighs up to his abdomen when he pushes one finger inside and starts pumping it in, all the while Lee Know lifts himself a bit from his seat and draws a bit down in his jeans, underwear too.

He sits himself down again and tugs down in the front of his boxers, and his dick springs up and curves heavily against his clothed stomach.

Its shaft is thick and lengthy, and the head is of an angry red now, pre cum reflecting a bit from the desk light as he puts a hand over the cockhead and gives it a stroke, thumbing the slit. Veins protrude on the skin as well, and it's so big and looks so good that Seungmin gets impatient and he presses another finger inside himself.

“You like that...?” Lee Know says, and the husky, lowered tone makes goosebumps string out on Seungmin’s skin as he writhes a bit, rutting down against his own fingers, burying them knuckles-deep before he slides them out again.

His heels dig into the mattress and his mouth is wide open as the next whimper eases out. “Yeah” he rasps, pace heightening as he finds a good angle, scissoring his fingers desperately when he hits a good spot.

"fuck..." he hears the older swear again, and it is murmured through gritted teeth. Lee Know begins to stroke himself as well, grip tight as he slides his palm up and down, and Seungmin cannot take his eyes away, mesmerized and so, so turned on.

"Lee Know," his voice is merciless but hushed now, making sure not to be too loud for it to go through the walls.

"I'd fuck you so good," Lee Know growls through the line, groaning as he pumps himself to the pace Seungmin fingers himself.

“Yes… yes… it's so good, feels so good," Seungmin feels his sight blur and he is so close.

He probes a third in a finger in and now his chest is heaving up and down maddeningly, all the while he keeps moaning Lee Know's name through small whispers and promising taunts.

His clothed heels are digging into the mattress as he strokes his cock too while fucking himself, bucking into his hand while he frantically hits the spot again and again till he is shaking all over, throat bubbling with all sorts of noises.

“So close, Sky..” Lee Know groans on the other line, and his breathing is heavy, as if he is restricting himself from being too loud as well. “So close…” he continues, voice throaty.

Seungmin is grimacing, toes curling within his woolen socks. So close, just a little more...

His body freezes when a voice booms through the house, and it is his mother who calls from downstairs, announcing that dinner is ready.

Seungmin gets so shocked that he jolts up from his seat, too occupied to see that Lee Know has just about the same reaction.

Seungmin quickly shuts the cam session so that they are back to a text chat. Before he gets to write anything, Lee Know has already joined in.

**Lee Know:** sorry something came up

**Lee Know:** my parents want my attention

**Lee Know:** I'll be back later okay??

**Lee Know:** see ya sweetie

Seungmin barely replies but clicks his laptop shut and slumps down onto his side and wheezes out, high on adrenaline and frankly annoyed from being interrupted when he was so close to his orgasm. He sighs heavily and curses, sitting up.

He hears his mother Seyeon wander down the hall. She knocks on Minho’s door first, and Seungmin can hear Minho say, “yeah, I’ll be there just... two sec, okay?”

Seungmin, with still slick hands, quickly wiggles into his boxers again and tenses as she knocks on his door too.

“Be there in a few minutes,” he yells.

Their mother sighs audibly and mumbles, “you teenagers are so busy all the time…”

Seungmin props himself down into a pair of loose sweatpants that barely hang properly on his hips, displaying a bit of the edge of his boxers beneath the striped blouse.

He walks into his bathroom and hurriedly washes his hands, and he curses when he looks at himself in the mirror, because his hair is disheveled and his cheeks are flushed, pupils dilated too. He puts some water on his face and does his best to fix his hair, nodding to himself once he looks at least somewhat decent. He comes down four minutes later, taking a seat.

The rest are already seated there, and his father, mutters “what was taking you so long?”

Seungmin grunts and answers with an absent excuse on his mind, “sorry, had to finish some things…” as he adjusts the chair and inches closer.

He reaches forward to grab the bowl with salad, but when he looks up; he sees that Minho is staring at him with wide brown eyes.

Seungmin blinks his eyes at first at the shocked expression, but then his eyes draft further and he sees what Minho is wearing; a navy blue shirt with the logo ‘supreme’ drawled there in fancy letters, and Seungmin can just see the edge of wine red boxers sticking up from the black jeans. The jeans are suspiciously straining around the crotch area too.

Their eyes meet again and there is something like recognition in both, a horrid discovery. Something freezes inside Seungmin, and he shortly looks down at himself; at his striped QT shirt, then up again, mouth agape, hand still gripping on the bowl.

“You know,” his voice comes out garbled, and he clears his throat. “I’m not so hungry anyway,” he says and abruptly raises himself, nearly knocking the chair over.

His mom blinks at him in oddity, about to ask, but Seungmin just wheezes out something unintelligible, another apology, and storms out of the room, up the stairs and runs into his own room. He slams the door shut and slides down the closed door, clutching in the front of his shirt where his heart is beating like that of a rabbit.

He swallows heavily and tries to let the situation seep in, but no matter how many times he tries to turn it, nothing makes sense. Yet at the same time, everything falls into place. Lee Know’s brother complex. Athlete. Dancer. Social circle. Everything.

Seungmin thumps the back of his head against the door and latches a hand onto his mouth, muttering curse words under his breath, still warm between his legs and jittery in his heart. He fears that Minho might come into his room, but nothing happens for the rest of the night. Instead, he has a hard time sleeping, lying awake as he thinks about how Minho has said all those things, how they have chatted for months and Seungmin has completely fallen in love with the virtual version. How Minho sounds when he groans, how big and nice his cock looks just on cam, and how much Seungmin has dreamt about it for months.

He startles when his phone, who has the hotline app running in the background, blares a familiar ping sound. He checks it with shaky fingers and sweaty palms.

1 notification from Lee Know,

**Lee Know:** you awake?

Seungmin didn’t, or more like, couldn’t reply.


	2. It's a sin

Seungmin is not sure what he is supposed to believe or do.

He still gets butterflies in his stomach when he thinks of Lee Know, but Lee Know is Minho, and this is just not how it is supposed to be. In addition, it is not just that; it has never only been that. Seungmin is well aware that there is more than one reason as to why he has been avoiding Minho for years, knows that it is not only the peppering and the younger brother's social circle that has caused this reluctance within Seungmin. There is much more to it than what the eyes can see, but for one to commit such sins that lie with the first deadly sin, lust, can be far worse than what comes with envy. With lust, taboos will mingle in the crowd and take place for the eye to see. His mind is strict in certain regards, and he has lived for long with the attempt to get over himself and move on, but the problem is that it is not easy when there are more than one factor involved.

For now, he has been able to push one of them into the back of his mind, strengthened the other instead because at least that one is socially acceptable. Because Jealousy between siblings is a common thing. Lusting for your brother is not.

It has always been up in his head. Seungmin has always known when it started. He knows that the two of them used to be attached by the hips, considered one another soul brothers and linked pinky fingers when they were just kids in order to promise that they would stay together forever.

The most truthful thing about the progress of Seungmin starting to ignore his brother is that it started when the act of growing up came along. Puberty is a ruthless thing, and linked to it is adolescence and unfamiliar feelings that only adults should feel. And when Minho went through puberty first in regards to physical matters, Seungmin's progress was going on inside his head. A distinctive shiver would run up his spine once Minho's voce dipped lower and got timbre instead of light and childish. Goosebumps would string out on his skin whenever Minho wanted to play tag or play games and grabbed his wrist; he was stronger too. 

Seungmin was fourteen when he had to kick Minho out of his bed during the nights when the latter wanted to cuddle, since it became too uncomfortable, and it occurred even before Minho visibly grew out of his old skin.

'We're too old for that, Minho,” was his excuse. “it's too warm for us to sleep together like this”, was the second. 

The ignoring began a little later when Minho started performing on a real stage rather than the usual dance practice, and continued from there. Seungmin has always been jealous that Minho seems so flawless, despite the fact that he can be clumsy too. But even when he's clumsy, people find him endearing or charming. 

In time, Minho grows some muscle and comes home in the evenings with sweat beaded on his forehead, exhausted, as he sits down and the muscle shirt dips a little too low for Seungmin's liking.

Disgusting. 

Filthy. 

Annoying. 

Too sweet. 

Too good to be true. 

Taboo.

Is a summary of just what goes through Seungmin's head whenever Minho bares another smile, and Seungmin has different thoughts, ideas and motives all at once. Being jealous has always been much easier, and the green monster within one's chest will always be eager to take over if only one allows it. Truth be told, Minho is nothing near perfect and has never been, but to Seungmin, the problem has always been that in his eyes he is.

'I might be in love with my brother' is not something anyone would say aloud, and not Seungmin either, by any means. It only makes it worse that Minho has listened to the way Sky has talked about his perfect brother, how handsome he is and sweet and that Seungmin is jealous. 

Therefore, the only solution back then and now has been to avoid the other before anything goes wrong, before Seungmin's body will move on its own accord and he will do something he is going to regret later on. He has avoided his brother for years without any said explanation, and there has never really been any but the one that is hidden far, far behind, one that Seungmin has never wanted to dig up again. In addition, he has dated different kinds of people through time and had his first girlfriend, but nothing has amended the bubbling in his chest and the anger flaring in his mind whenever Minho comes around. 

However, for a moment, he thinks something might have changed. That is when he starts to chat with Lee Know, a friendly but cute and cocky guy on the internet with a lack of smileys, one who has a toned buff body and familiar features. His everything that reminds him too much of the original picture and person inside his mind. Apparently, Seungmin has a crush, and for the first time it is not on his very own brother. 

Yet fate seems to want to piss on Seungmin and everything he loves, so now he sits with warmth between his legs for the nth time two full weeks after the webcam incident as he touches himself to the thought of Lee Know, or Minho, or both, whispering 'You like that?' into his ear. If he appeared to be ignoring Minho before in other’s eyes, Minho is currently receiving the more severe case of a silent treatment every time he tries to start either a chat or a face-to-face conversation. Seungmin has even blocked Lee Know on the hotline site, and through dinner Seungmin stares down at his plate of food. He doesn't talk and doesn't look anywhere other than down. Once he goes upstairs, he always locks his door, and when Minho stands on the other side and pleads for him to open the door, he plops earphones into his ears and turns the volume up and secondarily takes a long cold shower once Minho has given up. Seungmin has held all of this in for so much time, and suddenly it blares in his face, he finds out the second person he falls in love with is the first one that he has tried to escape from all along.

Once he has reached his climax, he sits back and just stares at his lubed fingers, as always, and wonders just what it is he is doing with his life, what he has gotten himself into.

Disgusting. 

Filthy.

Annoying.

He groans loudly and takes a scalding shower to get the thoughts off his mind. He doesn't hate his brother; the problem has always been that he loves him. And it's so wrong.

******

Having taken another late shift tonight, Seungmin comes home feeling even more annoyed than the usual. Someone's everything has been on his mind all day and he needs to relieve some stress. 

He takes the shared bathroom this time where they have a bathtub and fills the tub with water, and the sound of water sloshing down soothes him somehow. He hums softly as he dips some fingers beneath the glossy surface to check if it is warm enough. He undresses himself, but just when he slips his underwear down, he hears the house phone ringing from the kitchen; it's tone is high pitched and loud, and no one is home but him.

He groans something under his breath and picks the nearest towel, wrapping it loosely around his hips with one hand knotting the ends together at the side. He runs out and into the kitchen, and he is too hurried with the actions, so when he tries to grab the phone, he knocks it over instead and onto the floor, and it slides underneath the small cover of one kitchen counter. He quickly drops onto his knees and awkwardly fidgets around to get it, lining it up to his ear as he mutters a breathy "yes?" once he has pressed the green button down, towel slipping a bit so that it bunches around his shins instead where he sits. The phone beeps into his ear, signaling that he's too late. A sigh eases out between his teeth, and his eyes catch something behind him just then, resulting in his gaze flickering from the phone to what is behind him in a whisk.

His mouth falls ajar, and his heart might as well stop beating when he sees that Minho stands just a few meters away in his school uniform, and he must have come home from some other late event, busy with his last year. Minho's eyes are wide, face unreadable and body stiff. Seungmin makes a sound somewhat similar to a squawk and raises himself on legs that are like that of a newborn calf. He tries to cover himself up but only proceeds to drop the towel, shielding his crotch with his hands as he helplessly picks at the towel from the ground and manages to wrap it around his hips, though it is without skill, and it ends up getting crumpled. His cheeks are burning and Minho just continues to stare, eyes somewhat squinted now. 

"I- I dropped the phone," Seungmin blabbers and puts the phone in place, not even looking at the last caller. 

He aims to get away and tries to shy past Minho, but just as he passes Minho, the latter steps in his way so that Seungmin walks headfirst into the older’s chest. Seungmin makes a surprised noise and latches a hand onto his nose, staring up at Minho in surprise.

"Min," Minho says, and he reaches a hand out to grasp at Seungmin's bicep, keeping him in place.

Something rare crosses Minho's eyes, a vulnerable look; the one he will give when Seungmin's methods really get to him.

"Please let me talk to you," he tries, and when Seungmin tries to fidget out of his grasp, it only tightens. "Why're you avoiding me?" he asks.

Seungmin is almost tempted to laugh in his face because why not? We had sex cam, we jerked off to each other and, by the way, I've been in love with you for years now.

"Why do you think?" Seungmin snaps, though he isn't angry with Minho. In the end, it's always directed towards himself. His knuckles whiten on the towel where he holds it together, and Minho's jaw sets. "it's embarrassing that you... you saw me like..." he tries to reason.

"But you saw me too?" Minho prompts, taking a step closer, making Seungmin back away just barely if it is not for the arm on his bicep.

"Listen- why don't we just forget what happened?" the younger requests, even if he knows he is not going to forget anytime soon, or might never do.

Minho looks somewhat hurt at this for some reason, and his hold loosens a bit, palm sliding down the pale arm. Seungmin shivers, both from the tense atmosphere but from the touch too.

"Min, we need to talk about this," Minho says, and it seems like he is fighting against saying something else.

Seungmin chortles. "There is nothing to talk about!" he says. "Nothing happened!" he continues, and his eyes are stinging when he tries to move away again and Minho continues to keep him in place.

"Just… look at me, Seungmin..." Minho sounds angry now as well.

"Let me go!" the younger spits, but Minho doesn't budge. 

"Why are you doing this to me?" Minho makes sure to push all the right buttons. He grabs the both of Seungmin's shoulders and shakes him somewhat desperately and Seungmin can only use one hand to press distance between them, even if Minho is stronger and they end up almost standing chest to chest. "Why do you hate me so much?" Minho's voice cracks over and he sounds so wronged. "You... you liked Lee Know, didn't you? Why don't you like me?" he says then, and silence comes in the aftermath.

The scary thing is that this must have been one of the first times in a long time that Seungmin has really looked Minho in the eyes, and a part of him realizes just how cruel his methods have been, how crestfallen Minho must have felt for being ignored by someone he had pinky promised to stay together forever, back when they used to be together everyday. He has only made it worse with this. In the end, it's his fault, and his stupid emotions that won't stay put.

"I don't..." Seungmin's throat feels dry, but he speaks nonetheless. "I don't hate you," he says. "I've never hated you," he rips himself free from Minho's grasp and finally walks past. "Just don't... talk to me," he murmurs, and Minho does not move from his spot or follow Seungmin when the younger leaves.

Seungmin feels angry with himself tonight, and the bath does nothing to soothe his nerves as he sits there and thinks about the feelings flaring within. He lets himself be swallowed by the water as he looks up, and even if the lukewarm water is too hot on his face, he stays there till his lungs are yielding and he needs to breathe again. 

The shower lasts an hour, Their dad is on a business trip while their mom will be home late, so originally Seungmin has to make dinner for Minho and himself. However, instead of making dinner, he huddles onto his bed and turns on his laptop once he makes it to his room, still damp from the shower. Instead of putting on some clothes, he positions himself like two weeks ago, legs spread on the bed and back against the wall. This time he has settled the computer on a chair in front of the bed so that the camera can view more, though his face is still not on display.

He needs to get Minho out of his mind. He needs just anything right now, anything to quench the burn in his gut, the guilt and the helplessness. He needs to get acknowledged, no matter the methods. And on the internet, he is desired, and it's where he can pull the strings.

He logs onto the hotline page and presses a button he has avoided ever since he started.

**Sky is making a live session in 5 minutes. Press ENTER to join!**

He feels nervous, but not as much as when he had been with Minho. He has already prepped himself a bit and rustles on the bed to find a comfortable position. Some of his other contacts join the chat and already begin to bid in with comments, and some are invited. A fake feeling of pride swirls in the back of his mind, because he is at least wanted in this aspect. 

In the last two minutes before the start, he, on second thought, hurries over and draws a shirt over his head, the striped one with the QT logo imprinted on. He takes a deep breath and decides it should resemble another memory, and he sits down again and changes his stance, stroking himself so that he is hard when it begins. He sits back and relishes in the storm of comments that come once the webcam switches on and his thighs are displayed there, spread finely as he jerks himself off in a slow pace. 

Most of them compliment him on dirty nonsense, while others give him ideas for what he can do and what they want to see, trying to coax him into showing his face once he begins to finger himself after some minutes have passed. He plays coy, lets them see his lips and puckers them, as if mimicking a kiss before settling back again, smile turning into a small 'o' when he angles his fingers right. His toes curl and he feels warm inside from the attention, from the way they ask him to moan. Some viewers come and go, but one name makes him shortly halt, just for a teensy tiny second.

**Lee Know has joined the session as a VIEWER!**

For a moment, Seungmin thinks that it should not be possible since he has blocked Minho, but then he remembers that he has only done so regarding personal messaging, and not through live sessions or chat rooms. He mentally curses, but the fact that Minho is watching only makes his insides churn with warmth, his sinful lust that dwells in his veins. 

He pretends he has not seen the notification and continues, moaning prettily as the viewers want him to, showing his throat so they can see how his adam’s apple bobs up and down as he pumps his fingers in and out in a slow burn pace, hole clenching around the digits. He only halts a bit when his eyes catch certain lines pop up in the chat.

**Lee Know:** Sky what are you doing?

**Lee Know:** shut the camera

**Lee Know:** right now

Something constricts in Seungmin's throat, and he wants to say that it's none of Minho's business, and that he should leave the session. The other users tell Lee Know to leave and asks what his problem is, but Lee Know only goes on, telling Seungmin to close the session right now. 

Seungmin leans the back of his head against the wall and ignores it, heart jittery in his chest. He's not sure what it is he is doing anymore. He closes his eyes and continues scissoring his fingers in, thighs quivering. He misses the next line from Minho.

**Lee Know:** if you don't close the cam within ten seconds im going to do it for you

Seungmin only sees it when a new message pops up.

**Lee Know:** fine then

Just then, the slam from a door resounds in the corridor that can only belong to Minho's room, and the noise of footsteps travelling closer makes Seungmin's shoulders arch up and his motions halt. He stiffens where he sits and goosebumps strings out on his skin from the panic rising up his spine, along with a different kind of anticipation. A lump clogs his throat because he remembers he hasn't locked the door, and it is barged open. Minho storms in, jaw set and lips held in a tight line, and he looks downright furious. He is wearing something more casual now, some sweatpants and a black snug t-shirt, and he doesn't waste a second but storms over and slams the top screen down so that the laptop goes into hibernation mode. Seungmin holds his breath all the while; kneecaps knocked together in front of him and hands withdrawn, catching fistfuls of the duvet instead in surprise. He looks up at Minho with wide, wide eyes and a late explanation on his lips, but Minho is quicker.

"Why the hell would you do that?" he yells, and his chest is heaving up and down. He stands right in front of Seungmin by the edge of the bed, fingers curling into fists. He does not only look angry, but also distressed and something else. Like he is fighting against several ideas of how to handle the situation.

Seungmin has no words, because it is unlike himself to do this as well. This is his first time to do it so openly since he has always been a reserved person. It has only been based on the anger he holds towards himself, the need to be seen, to release whatever knot it is that has winded itself inside his chest for too long.

"Why..." Minho leans down and he takes a hold of Seungmin's bicep like before, though not too hard, careful one way or another. "Why did you let them see you like that?" he asks, as if he hadn't seen Seungmin like that mere weeks ago.

"What is it to you anyway?" Seungmin retorts, voice cracking over. He swears his heart might as well gallop out of his chest now, and he is half hard in front of Minho, thighs barely able to cover it since Minho gives his bicep a provocative yank at the reply, the grip less careful now the more he seems to get riled up and spurred with emotions.

"What is it to me...?" Minho mockingly repeats, and his brows are furrowed, that look from earlier crossing his eyes. 

Seungmin is about to make another comment, but is silenced as Minho leans forward and kisses him hard. Minho manhandles Seungmin onto his back on the other side of the bed where it stretches out, hand still on his arm as he presses him into the duvet and into his mouth when the younger gasps. Their teeth clack but Seungmin can pay it no mind, because Minho's tongue strokes past his own and probes wherever it can reach, lips aligned and wet noises sounding from the actions along with groaning and breathy outbursts. The older only draws back to breathe in for a mere second before sucking on Seungmin's lower lip, starting anew again.

Seungmin is frozen in shock for the first couple of seconds, but then his hands fumble around, still wet with lube, and catch onto Minho's shirt, desperate and aggressive as Minho leans down on Seungmin in return. One of his palms runs down to grasp at a bare thigh, nails digging crescent marks into the skin. it's almost embarrassing how loud Seungmin's moan is, how the hand on Minho's back slides down to frantically grasp at Minho's wrist on his thigh to guide it down lower and between his legs, whimpering under his breath. it's as if he has gone on autopilot and everything wells up, making his fingers shaky and his limbs tremble. 

He is already slicked up and stretched, but gasps anyway when Minho immediately responds and his dry fingers slide down between Seungmin's parted thighs to press against the wet hole. Minho traces the rim just barely before he buries them, knuckles deep and begins to thrust them in with a ruthless pace, crooking his fingers to rub against the inner walls before he draws out again and continues the pace

He doesn't even question the way Seungmin just lets him or asks him to do so, but continues kissing Seungmin breathless, the movements of his arm so harsh that Seungmin chants punctured and cut off 'ah's for each time Minho thrusts the fingers in again.

Seungmin's knees are trembling and he lets out a garbled moan when Minho grazes a nice spot inside him, hanging on while they have to stop kissing because he can barely respond properly anymore.

Minho groans against his open mouth, muttering a: "Min." He watches the way Seungmin's eyelashes flutter, how the beautiful lips in front of him moans, an insistent "Minho..." amidst the stuttering. Minho's voice is better in person, throaty and soft just the way that makes Seungmin's back arch off the mattress as his hips spasm, hole clenching around the fingers that continue to ram into him. The motions are still so harsh that when he cums, he bounces a bit with the actions and he has spurted along his stomach and up to his chest, on his shirt too.

He mellows out in the aftermath, breathing hard and cheeks flushed. Minho above him withdraws his fingers and hovers on all four, and his breathing is labored as well. Seungmin wants to do anything, say anything. There are so many questions in his mind, but Minho might have a lot as well.

He remembers how Lee Know had talked a lot about his younger brother, about how much he missed him, wanted to be with him and felt bad because they used to be so great together. It means that Minho has heard about Seungmin's rants as well, about Seungmin being too reluctant, too caught up in jealousy and presumably something else, and despite wanting to treat his brother good, nothing can amend his previous behavior.

Seungmin finally opens his mouth. "I'm sorry," he rasps. 

Many things lie in those words, and it can both be for good or for worse, and to think this is what it takes to finally loosen the knot in his chest makes him unable to look Minho in the eyes.

Minho swallows heavily, although a somewhat relieved sigh seeps through his teeth. He leans down and kisses Seungmin softly, chastely even, on the lips and then raises himself, leaving the room without any word.

******

The next morning, things are not the same as before. Something tinges the atmosphere, and their parents quickly notice it.

Seungmin does no longer ignore Minho, at least not in the same way as before. Because Minho is having none of it, simply. Seungmin has a hard time looking Minho in the eyes, but he is to be surprised when Minho courageously goes over and fixes his collar just as Seungmin is about to do so, staring straight into his eyes shamelessly in a way that makes something in Seungmin's heart flutter, makes him blink his eyes questionaly. 

For once, nothing goes through Seungmin's mind. Everything is turned upside down, somehow. Minho no longer hangs his head low and accepts whatever it is Seungmin decides to do... and it doesn't feel bad. Seungmin is taken aback by how natural it feels when Minho then runs a hand through Seungmin's hair and makes a comment about him having bed hair as he then turns around and takes on his own shoes, and today they are both leaving around the same time, miraculously.

Seungmin is not sure if he understands what is going on. Yet he understands that Minho speaks back. He knows something about Seungmin that Seungmin might not even know himself. About his reluctance, about the absence put on display to hide something bigger. The both of them have always communicated through body language and not so much with words. Seungmin with his erratic mind tends to say a lot of things he doesn't mean, and Minho might just not have known what to say out of fear of what it is that had turned Seungmin into ignoring him for so long.

It starts out gradually. They don't do anything to each other for the next few weeks despite the ruckus in the past, but something has definitely calmed down within Seungmin's heart that makes him think it's better not to hurry, not right now. While a wall of pressure and self loathing slowly crumbles, even if the guilt still resides. 

It starts with the small comments Minho will make every now and then that are directly spoken to Seungmin, where Seungmin, albeit hesitant, will answer. Facing the shame he has been afraid of, to give in and admit he has missed being with Minho too. They talk during dinner, and their parents are pleasantly surprised with the outcome, sitting with gleeful smiles as they watch the interactions between their sons.

It grows into something different one night where Seungmin walks down the hall, about to brush his teeth in the shared bathroom, and Minho comes out first, already having done so. He goes forward and leans in to press a kiss to the corner of Seungmin's mouth, muttering a soft "night Min." before leaving. Seungmin stands there, hand on the doorknob as he hears Minho's door close some feet behind him.

He goes to bed that night with warmth between his legs he has had on repeat, but also a heart that is strangely soothed because he is not the only one with these feelings. He might never have been.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! I hope you guys like it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
> 
> Thank you for the great responses I really appreciate them!


	3. I love you

“You are spacing out again, dear," Minho snorts at his mom’s comment and runs a hand through his hair, eyes bleary. 

"Ah, it's just... Yeah," he makes a motion with his hand. "School and stuff," he wriggles his nose and stabs the potato on his plate with a fork. "Dance practice has taken its toll as well."

They are eating dinner, and Minho gets distracted a little too often, hunched over his plate as he stares into his food, occasionally eating it though the most slips off his fork when he tries to give it a go. Seungmin sits in front of him on the other side of the table, munching on some rice, saying nothing. Beneath the table, he pokes one of Minho's heels with his toes, and this does wake Minho up.

They have still not really talked about the occurrence back then, or the occasional chaste kisses that happen here and there. A few petty weeks have gone by, and Minho is busy with his dancing and the occasional assignments, while Seungmin has to focus on some upcoming finals that will round up his final grades. The good progress between them is that they have become friends again, ever so slowly, and since Seungmin's reluctance has gone down and Minho's courage has grown, it has not taken long before they send each other warm smiles over the dinner table, in the mornings on the way to school or in the evenings before going to bed. They sometimes watch movies together, and Seungmin helps Minho with math or English homework if the older is in need of it. Things are fine, somehow. 

There is a silent agreement settled between them. Nothing definite, but just the small wording: ‘We'll make it better. We'll be okay.’ Because there is no denying that the two of them miss each other and want to be equals again, even if it means just as brothers or as friends, as if they are trying to get back to what they were before when they were younger, although Seungmin is very sure that is unlikely to happen. At least not in the same way, given the way his heart beats and his fingertips tingle whenever his brother is a mile distance. Yet it is worth the try, and even if Seungmin finds his chest wanting, finds himself subconsciously reaching out around times he should not, he knows it is better for them to be on good terms than for Seungmin to start ignoring Minho again, because that will only strengthen the guilt and turmoil.

Minho looks up from the plate and into Seungmin's eyes, mouth slightly agape. Seungmin raises his brows as if to ask 'what's wrong?', referring to the absence in question, but Minho's eyes fall on the fork pinched between Seungmin's lips instead. He notices how Seungmin’s tongue stuck out to absentmindedly wipe off some sauce on the metal as he slides it against his lower lip while drawing it out till it hovers in front of his mouth. His eyes are as doe as always, questioning and a little worried, but warm nonetheless. It stirs something in Minho's gut. Therefore, he looks away and down again, sending Seungmin a weak smile first. Seungmin's cheeks are warm, because he caught the staring, even if he pretends he did not. He does the same, every now and then. 

He spaces out when Minho comes home from dance practice, still a little breathy as Minho usually pulls in the collar of his muscle shirt and reveals beautiful pale skin and a sheen of sweat, and Seungmin always has to go to his own room and think everything through. Seungmin keeps spacing off when he sees Minho smile, especially because it has been directed to himself as of lately. He gets warm in his heart and giddy when their fingers brush when they make dinner during the days where they have arranged a food day so that their parents do not overwork. He goes to bed with notifications from Minho who messages him and asks about his day, where they, like Lee Know and Sky had done, end up talking most of the night and share sleepy smiles the next morning.

Seungmin knows it is just a cover to say that they are probably aiming to become good friends, the ideal brothers. Because what he feels is just not brotherly. Moreover, what Minho seems to feel in return, is not the case either. What Minho does is that he is his usual boyish self with the occasional dumb grinning and alluring smirks. However, he also happens to stare at Seungmin as if the latter has hung the moon. He subconsciously leans closer and sometimes he rests a warm palm on Seungmin's lower back when they are reading some of the same stuff and Minho decides to peek over his shoulder. 

To Minho, it comes as something natural, while Seungmin on the other hand tries not to melt into a puddle from the external warmth burning into his back and down his gut. Minho likes to touch. He likes to reach out, and he often strays some messy bangs out of Seungmin's face or ruffles his hair, as an elder brother would do. That is not it, though. He does it in a way maybe a lover would do, making sure Seungmin is always feeling content or that the latter smiles. Minho keeps his hands close and occasionally rests them on Seungmin's thigh when they sit in Seungmin's room, going through some of the elder's drama phrases that Seungmin has to practice with someone in order to memorize them.

Their faces often seek one another, and it is tiring. From one moment to another, they are laughing at something while doing bad voice-overs or are discussing a matter of interest, but in the next, they lean together and almost bump foreheads as if there is a magnetic field binding the two of them to each other. They end up more than often inched close, face to face. With Seungmin, whose eyes are wide, lips slightly parted. And Minho whose hand continuously rests somewhere on Seungmin's form, eyes half lidded and a tongue darting out to wet his own lips while they stare into each other's eyes, gazes raking over each other's faces too.

The tension is always heavy after that, and it is either Minho or Seungmin who draws away, who looks down to regard what they originally are to attend. Seungmin often ends up leaving the room, half hard in his pants, as he has to sit in the shared bathroom by the end of the hall and just breathe out before he does something stupid. In return, he says nothing about the times where they have watched movies and his hand has, by some twisted fate, ended up nestled on Minho's thigh or a little between his legs. How Seungmin has seen Minho's thick curve against the pouch of his jeans, or down his thigh beneath the denim, aroused and mere scraps of fabric away. 

Sometimes they don't even have to inflict small innocent but lingering touches upon each other before the tension is so heavy it reaches down between their legs, and it is an unspoken subject. They have had so many chances to take it further, but none of them really does except for a few incidents and that is because of the taboo, the moral and logic that cannot be ignored just because of lust and love. 

Therefore, they do other things instead. They spend good times together, moments of innocence where it does not have to be about love or attraction but just the comfortableness of wanting to be together and in each other's presence, to feel content as long as they can have fun together, talk to each other and do things.

Seungmin and Minho stand together, hip against hip as they wash the plates and cups from dinner, Seungmin who scrubs and Minho who dries the clean stuff. They are humming along to a song from the scratchy radio, and their parents are watching television in the kitchen, pleased that their sons can work together now and do chores together as well.

"Are the upcoming projects hard?" Minho asks, giving Seungmin a telling smile.

Seungmin huffs and bumps his shoulder against the other's. "It sucks," he mutters, like the grown up he is and fights hard with a tiny stain of grease that will not come off one knife.

Minho grins and makes a wiggle with his head, looking victorious. "Mine's not so hard, luckily. But the dancing is icky in time. I'm sore all over and so tired," he sighs. "But I get these pecs and muscles from it that all the girls adore, see?" he flexes his arm and displays one bulging bicep, grinning naughtily to the younger, and Seungmin flicks some water and soap on him that makes him yowl.

"Show off," Seungmin sticks his tongue out and returns to the scrubbing, now with a pout on his face.

It is not that his own body is petite, but he has smaller curves, and is just not as broad-shouldered as his brother is, even if he for a certain period tried to go to the fitness center to improve himself. He got too self conscious about it and only went there two times before he gave up, and now he stands here, mulling over his own half-skinny arms and his just average weight and hipbones slightly jutting out. 

Minho bumps into him this time, brows raised. "You look good in case you are wondering, you know," he says somewhat playfully, wagging his eyebrows. "There are different body types for a reason. We have to appreciate all of them and find beauty in each," he says and looks too cocky for his own good.

"You read some beauty magazine again, didn't you?" Seungmin deadpans.

"It was good, okay," Minho shrugs. "To understand women ideals and morals, you have to become one," he says. His hands stop motioning with the plate in his hand. "Wait...," he says, eyes squinted as he thinks of the sentence he just spewed through for a second time.

Seungmin snorts. "Good going, Einstein." He stops. "Wait, did you just refer to me as a woman?"

Minho puckers his lips and makes a quirky expression, shrugging again as he exaggeratedly arches his brows. Seungmin makes sure to whip him with a rolled towel when they are done, earning Minho some bright marks through the clothing. 

******

From another angle, things look average between them. Just like now, where Seungmin sits in the kitchen by the table in the evening, just after he has been out with his friends, Jisung, Felix and Hyunjin to hang out. He has some homework to do and has his nose scrunched up, tapping a pen against his chin as he ponders about the line in question. The hair on his nape stands on end when a warm breath suddenly fans over his neck from behind and close to one ear and the sensitive skin behind it, followed by a low, timbre "boo" that makes him smash his kneecaps up the underside of the table and a surprised gasp ease out of his mouth.

Tears nearly collect at the corners of his eyes when he hears Minho laugh and settle on a chair next to him, looking smug but also sorry as he pats one of Seungmin's thighs and apologizes for surprising him.

"you are always so intense when you study," Minho laughs. "I couldn't resist," he leans back and bite his lips, crossing his ankles beneath the table all casual.

Seungmin is still processing the pain in his knees and the tingling down his spine, so he only mutters a "not funny," as he sniffs and looks down at the papers again.

Minho is silent for a while as Seungmin returns to studying. Seungmin can feel his brother's glare burn into the side of his face, and after another five minutes, he slams the pen down and raises an unimpressed brow in Minho's direction. 

"What is it?" he asks.

A sly smile appears on Minho's mouth, and he makes a nonchalant gesture. 

"Nothing," he says. 

He always taunts Seungmin one way or another, just like now. Seungmin would say he does mind, but then again not really. 

"There's clearly something," he retorts.

"Nothing at all," Minho sings songs.

The younger grumbles something under his breath and returns his gaze to the papers, though a small wobbly grin is on his lips. He cannot help it, really. Minho is silly, but he manages to make Seungmin feel light and annoyed but in a good way. 

Some more time passes by where Minho just sits there and stares, though it is more casual now and occasionally on and off as he plays with a piece of rubber from one of the other pencils, rolling it over the table in small draws.

Seungmin sighs, at last. "What is it, really?" he asks.

Minho seems hesitant. "Can we watch a movie?" he offers instead of answering, eyes cat like, the thing he does when he wants something to go his way.

Seungmin almost reels. "I have to study, you know."

"Please?"

"No, Minho."

"Pretty please?"

"Min- no!"

"Pretty, beautiful please with sugar and whipped cream on top?" Minho is reeled forward now, and that damn hand is on Seungmin's thigh, clenching softly in a way that makes Seungmin need a moment to fight the heat rising to his cheeks.

The answer is a muffled reply; Seungmin who shuffles his feet a bit and looks down at his own thighs.

"What?" Minho tilts his head, a knowing smile on his lips.

"Fine," Seungmin murmurs.

Minho withdraws his hand in favor of jumping up, saying a "works every time," as he drags Seungmin's chair out, and Seungmin yelps when his wrist is grabbed. He is dragged into Minho's room upstairs, though Minho shortly goes back to the front hall to retrieve his school bag on the way, hand still warm on Seungmin's wrist. 

They settle down on Minho's double-sized bed, lining up the duvet and some pillows for their backs against the wall. They use Minho's chair as a small table, placing Minho's laptop there.

"Want popcorn?" Minho asks as he browses on the internet and probably on some illegal site with free movies to watch that are of a reasonable quality.

"No, this is fine," Seungmin responds, nuzzling into the duvet.

Minho takes a seat as well after having chosen a movie, some new animated English movie.

"Another cartoon?" the younger taunts.

Minho puckers his lips. "Don't tell me you don't like them, you with your Disney stash. Nerd."

Seungmin laughs and gives Minho's elbow a pinch, and their eyes return to the screen. They have drawn the curtains down, and the only light in the room is from the laptop and from Minho's lamp on his desk, giving off a cozy, warm glow.

Already halfway through the movie, Minho starts to doze off, probably because he has been out overtraining too much in the dance studio, as he tends to do, since he has always had a lot of endurance and passion for the things he strives to work for. Seungmin smiles to himself as he turns his head and sees how Minho's mouth is half agape while he snores lightly, back of his head against the wall and chin tilted up, throat uncovered. The younger is aware he should focus on the rest of the movie, but he ends up tracing Minho's features bathed in the warm light, shadows sculpting his face and jaw and collarbones too from the loose shirt he is wearing.

Seungmin reaches a hand up and closes Minho's mouth by tipping his chin up, resulting in Minho's teeth doing a little clack. The older eyes fly open, drowsy and Seungmin forgets what a light sleeper Minho is. He withdraws his hands and shrinks a bit, mumbling a: "oh, sorry… you were... um... your mouth was hanging open," and Minho has his eyes squinted, still affected by sleep.

Minho grins somewhat fondly though, and leans forward to bump their foreheads together, as if it comes natural to him after just having woken up. "is fine," he mutters.

Seungmin swallows heavily, because Minho has leaned in so that their nose tips are brushing too. Minho's breath is present across his lips, just barely, spreading out a tingly feeling in Seungmin's stomach. 

This is just like any other time. Just a few more seconds and Minho will regain his senses and slip out of his lazy state. Therefore, Seungmin is not sure why he closes his eyes. Why is Minho tilting his head a bit and their lips softly align. It is ginger and barely noticeable, a chaste kiss, but the action itself makes Seungmin breathe out shakily.

When he opens his eyes, Minho seems a bit more awake, eyes half lid but eyebrows furrowed. They should draw a line here and now. Nevertheless, Seungmin is the one who crosses it this time and swipes it faint as he shuts his eyes again and presses his lips against Minho's. 

Minho makes a deep sound in the back of his throat, and he adjusts himself a bit to draw his torso Seungmin's way, reaching a hand up to Seungmin's jaw to cup it. They breathe through their noses, but still have to draw apart to inhale sharply when their lips meet in a kiss that lasts longer than the other. 

Seungmin automatically inches closer by digging the heels of his hands into the mattress beneath, craning his neck to get better access. A hitched, sensual gasp eases out of his mouth when he feels something warm swipe against his lower lip. Minho licks a small, kittenish stripe there and breathes out heavily into Seungmin's mouth when the younger parts his lips.

Seungmin's eyebrows do a tick when their tongues meet in the middle; the tips curling into each other, a wet and warm slide that creates a slick sound, followed by breathy moans and the smack of their lips once withdrawing just to go back again and deepen the kiss. The pace is unhurried but still somewhat desperate, with Seungmin who has somehow ended up straddling Minho now, having swung a leg over his lap to sit himself there and press close, and Minho who brings the both of his hands down to grasp at Seungmin's thighs, climbing up to knead the younger’s ass with his palms. 

Seungmin is levered now so Minho is the one who has to crane his neck up. They slot their mouths together, immediately opening up to seek each other's warmth again. Minho swipes his tongue over the flat of Seungmin's teeth, mapping his mouth with care, all the while their lips and chins press together as they try to get closer and closer. 

Seungmin barely realizes how his hips have begun to move, doing small rolls downwards, to which Minho presses him against himself in return, his clothed cock against the underside of one thigh.

The air around them gets snug and a little heated. Noises fill the room, a mix between their heavy panting, the occasional soft moans along with small squelches from their tongues working over each other; transferring spit between them.

It continues like this for minutes or a quarter, with their hands grasping here and there, and mouths never off each other for more than a few seconds as they grind slowly. Just as they lean back to get a little air and to look into each other's eyes, the sound of footsteps travel up the stairs outside in the hall and they hear their mom talk, and she is probably using the house phone right now.

As quick as the heavy tension slipped in, it reeved beneath the crack of the door as fear splays between them on their faces. They scramble away from each other and Seungmin nearly falls off the bed in the process. The both of them meet in the middle again to grab the duvet, shielding their crotches as they sit against the wall, shoulder against shoulder, pretending to watch the movie that has already ended.

The door opens moments later as their mother peeks in, phone cradled between her ear and her shoulder as she carries a cloth basket, talking into the phone device. She stops when she sees her sons, and raises a brow. "Gosh, you scared me," she laughs and settles the basket down. "Here's your clothes, Minho. Remember to fold it neatly as I've told you before, right?" she says after she has spoken a 'two secs' into the phone. Her expression changes when she gets a closer look at the teenagers before her. "You guys okay? Looks like you've been wrestling." 

Seungmin lets out a half startled choke, clearing his throat. "We... we're just watching a movie," he says and draws the duvet closer, and Minho nods too frantically for it to be casual. The both of them look a little alarmed, hair disheveled and lips swollen and red, though they hope she cannot see it from the distance and lack of light.

"All right then," she says, and shrugs after some suspicious glaring. "Seungmin, you gotta clean your stuff on the dinner table. Dad's done with the cooking in a few minutes, so go deck the table when you are done."

Seungmin nods and is about to get out of the bed, but hesitates, because he is still hard in his jeans. "Um, just... there's only a bit of the... of the movie left. Can we watch it? Just five minutes, I promise," he says, instead of usually groaning when he is told to do chores.

Their mom makes the 'I'm Watching You' gesture. "Five minutes, nothing more," she playfully says, and then darts out.

Seungmin and Minho are left alone then, not looking at each other. And the tension climbs back. 

******

Things become awkward between them after that for a few couple of days, but it is mellowed as they step into the pattern they had before. It is not as it is the first time it happens. It is not as if they have not almost had their hands down each other's pants before, because the thing is that they have. Even if the count is at minimum and it only happens when things crumble and the tension becomes too much. 

Seungmin tries to forget the time he gave Minho a blowjob because they had ended up making out throughout one of Minho's math lessons, one where Minho had a hand fisted in Seungmin's hair as Seungmin hummed around the girth of Minho's thick cock and swallowed when he came down his throat.

He tries to forget the time where Minho ate him out, this time while watching a movie as Seungmin had been perched over on his shins on all four in front of Minho's lap while they were on the bed.

Minho had been so good and diligent with his tongue, moaned against Seungmin's hole as if it was the best he had ever tasted. He had dug his fingers into the pale thighs, buried his nose between the space of his ass cheeks, and lapped his tongue over the rim until Seungmin was so sensitive that he was trembling all over, breath hitching and tears streaking down his cheeks and mouth parted in delight.

They might look like the average pair of siblings on the outside, but there are the incidents where the focus slips and being goody two soul brothers is just not enough, it will just not suffice.

However, they have never taken it further than.

******

it's late.

Darkness looms outside, and the windows are uncovered in the kitchen so Seungmin can look out and see that the neighbor must still be awake, since there is light in one of the windows, just as much as Seungmin waddles around in the kitchen, up this late as he warms a class of almond milk for himself.

It is Friday, and his parents have already gone to sleep since it is past midnight, and most of the town and neighborhood is sleeping.

The kitchen is dark except for the light emitting from a lamp hanging above the dinner table, and Seungmin leans against one of the kitchen counters as he waits for the milk to be heated in the microwave. He relishes in the dull noise of the machinery doing its work, nodding off a bit while he rubs his sleepy eyes, standing in his boxers only and a loose tshirt that is a size too big for him.

His thoughts drift around the room. He thinks about the current drama he is a part of, and about his schoolwork, about his friends too and that he has to go to the cinema with Hyunjin tomorrow. He thinks about certain brown eyes and mocha dark hair, about beautiful pale skin, crinkled almond shaped eyes and a kitten like smile, too.

He moves like a robot and takes out the glass of hot milk when the microwave deems itself done with a beep. The glass is a little too hot and he curses under his breath, moving to the sink to put it there while it cools down. Just as he looks up, he loses his grip on the glass and knocks it over in the sink, startled by the face in the window where Minho is peeking through the darkness with a lewd smile on his face as it seems he doubles over laughing due to Seungmin's reaction.

Seungmin curses loudly this time and clutches at his chest with the hand that is not dapped in milk. He hears a door click open from the front entrance, travelling through the silent house. Seconds later, a smiling Minho comes forth, and he is wearing a leather jacket, some rippled onyx jeans and a snug long sleeved, wine red shirt with some scrawl on it with a cap twisted backwards on his head.

"Shoulda seen your face Min," he mocks, still laughing, voice a little huskier than usual.

Minho earlier told him he had to go to a party, and he usually first comes home much later than this, but tonight he surprises Seungmin, and had apparently decided the best thing was to scare the living crap out of the younger when he spotted him through the window on his stride home, just before.

"I swear to god...," Seungmin rolls his eyes and shakes his head, still driven with adrenaline. He grumbles, wide awake now, face drawn in another pout.

"Look what you've done," he makes an exaggerated hand motion towards the sink, and has already washed the milk off his hand. "I was going to drink that, you doofus...," his voice trails off and turns childishly awry, and now he is just sad, because he really wanted that goddamn milk.

"Aw," Minho does not sound sorry at all. He takes off his cap and puts it on one of the counters, striding over to ruffle Seungmin's hair, pushing the bangs back as he smooches his forehead. "I'll make it up for you," he murmurs.

Seungmin sighs, but smiles and leans into the touch, closing his eyes. He smells a faint scent of smoke and beer, and can smell a faint trace of alcohol in Minho's breath when the latter leans down and bumps their nose tips.

"Are you drunk?" The younger asks.

Minho chuckles. "No, just a little tipsy."

Seungmin rolls his eyes, but he gives Minho a fond look nonetheless.

"Go to sleep," he says and pats Minho on the chest, sliding his palm down his stomach afterwards. He can see how Minho's stomach tenses under the touch beneath the shirt, and the younger shuffles closer instead.

"Don't wanna," he singsongs slowly, breath puffing out against Seungmin's lips.

Seungmin does his best to ignore the slow burn in his stomach. Minho sounds so gruff, his voice timbre. It grinds over Seungmin's skin and makes him want to lean closer, to be enveloped in everything that is Minho, his very own brother.

"Go to sleep," he whispers, but it is weaker this time, restrictions fading and temptations rising.

Minho repeats the same as before. He presses a chaste kiss onto Seungmin's upper lip, murmuring a soft "don't wanna," there.

Seungmin is not sure why he lets them continue this game of cat and mouse. Yet he does not draw away as Minho starts kissing him with hungry pecks and persistent pushing, does not say stop when Minho slides his tongue into his mouth to get whatever he can reach.

His hands catch fistfuls of Minho's leather jacket on each side, hanging on when Minho presses against him and backs him into the kitchen counter further away and beside the sink.

"Seungmin," Minho stops just when Seungmin's head starts to feel airy, lips already kissed red and pretty. "I can't-" Minho's breathing is labored. He leans forward and presses his mouth against the sensitive skin beneath Seungmin's ear, nuzzling his face there. "I can't stop thinking about you," he whispers.

Seungmin's toes curl against the wooden floor beneath him.

Minho continues. "you are just- you are just all that's on my mind," he urges on, raising goose bumps on his brother's pale skin. Seungmin hears him inhale sharply, how Minho noses down the crook of his throat and to the juncture of his shoulder. "Can't get you out of my head, Min." he continues. "I just want you so, so bad," he says and presses their crotches together, one leg sliding between Seungmin's thighs. "I want-" he sounds out of breath now. "I want you… I want you so bad,” he leans back, eyes dazed when he presses a kiss against Seungmin's open mouth. "Want to make you mine," he gives the crack of Seungmin's mouth a , "all mine." His hands snake down Seungmin's sides, sneaking up under the hem of the black cotton shirt. "Only mine."

Seungmin knows he can say no. He knows a line has to be drawn. However, the both of them are dazed; both affected, and both so, so in love, so lost.

"Please," is all Seungmin whispers in return, soft and almost inaudible. He closes his eyes as a tremor surges through him at the mere thought of having Minho inside him. "Please," his voice cracks over.

A deep tune rolls off Minho's tongue, and he starts kissing Seungmin again, with hands that are far more eager this time. He presses Seungmin against the counter until the younger nearly reels over. He hooks his hands beneath the back of Seungmin's thighs and lifts him up onto the it, planting him there, spreading his thighs apart to fit in between. 

While they kiss and nip at each other, Minho leans over, hand grabbing the string that draws the curtains down, because he knows the old lady living in the house on the other side can be a little too nosy for her own good, and is a snoopy raven even during nights.

He returns his attention to Seungmin, though it has never left him in the first place. He kisses his brother hard, even if the pace is never hurried, but slow and explorative.

They kiss until the both of them are in a need of air, panting loudly but not letting any other noises out, because their parents are just up the stairs somewhere by the end of the hall, sleeping.

The both of them are hard and worked up already, and Seungmin is palming Minho through the jeans, to which Minho grinds against the eager palm, hands grasping at Seungmin's ass cheeks through the thin material of his boxers in return.

There is much that they can do, so much to explore, but Minho has something clear in his mind, and so does his brother. "Wait here," he says, pressing one last kiss against Seungmin's jawline before he disappears out of the kitchen and upstairs, careful with his footing.

Seungmin is left there on the counter, trying to catch his breath. He feels impatient and begins to palm himself through his boxers, fingers of his free hand curling around the edge of the counter as he grinds the heel of one palm against his .

He only stops when a hand slides up his thigh and grasps lightly there, and when he opens his eyes he sees Minho stand before him, leather jacket discarded and a bottle of lube and a condom in his hand.

He puts it on the space next to Seungmin, while he goes in for a sloppy session of open mouthed kisses before Seungmin murmurs a hasty, "get-" he inches a little back. "Get them off," he stretches his legs and lifts his bum, using his arms as leverage.

Minho immediately obliges and drags down in the boxers until he is wriggling them off one foot so that it dangles on the other ankle. He nestles in between Seungmin's thighs again and drags his own shirt off, and Seungmin immediately starts trailing kisses down Minho's neck, down one collarbone and around the skin on his chest. He drags a hand over Minho's stomach, pressing his fingertips into the bridge between the abs, scathing his nails there just briefly.

"Spread your legs," Minho says the words softly along the shell of Seungmin's ear, and Seungmin spreads them wide, inching back on the counter to hike his legs up, toes on the edge, all bared for Minho to see. Minho makes a pleased noise and gives one of Seungmin's inner thighs a light slap, feeling the skin under his fingers.

"So pretty," he murmurs, eyes downcast as he watches Seungmin's curve up and over his own shirt, how his hole clenches a bit in anticipation.

"you are so perfect," Minho continues while he pops the cap of the lube open and spreads some out on his fingers before settling it down again. He leans down and presses a kiss to one inner thigh while he rubs two fingertips against Seungmin's entrance, watches how it clenches around the tips when he prods them in, two at once, burying them knuckles deep. Not giving time to the younger to adjust.

"Yes," Seungmin whimpers, rutting back against the digits. "Yeah- like that-"

Minho starts pumping them and scissoring them inside Seungmin, rubbing the pads along the soft inner walls as he observes how the younger writhes on the desk, panting softly, a pretty blush spread on his cheeks and blown eyes looking straight at him.

The room is quiet save for the wet noises of Minho's fingers pumping in and out of Seungmin, adding a third so that Seungmin's hole stretches around the width and strains, and a noise of a clock ticking is the only other background play, save for the occasional sounds of kissing and panting.

Minho takes it slow, even if everything inside him urges to just take, to claim, to go ahead and fuck his brother sore until the latter cannot walk. He takes it slow though because this means so much to him, the display in front of him is all he has wanted to see for so long, and Seungmin is so beautiful to him, so, so beautiful.

Seungmin is the one who grows impatient first. He whimpers under his breath and hooks a finger under the edge of Minho's pants, tugging down in it inquiringly. "Want you-" he swallows hard, "want you inside me, Minho."

Minho takes a deep inhale, warmth flaring in his gut. He withdraws his fingers and starts unbuckling his belt with trembling fingers, and Seungmin has to help.

They both draw down his jeans and boxers too, spreading the fly open so that Minho's cock springs up, hanging midair due to the swollen, heavy cockhead. He is leaking a bit of pre cum already, and Seungmin thumbs the slit, getting a bead of it on his digit as he puts his thumb up to his lips and sucks it off, shuddering at the bitter but good taste.

Minho tenses at the sight, a curse slipping past his lips. He tugs at his own hard cock, slicking it with the lube on his fingers, and Seungmin leans closer, still in the spread position though he looks down with a dazed look on his face, tracing Minho's with an attentive gaze

"it's so big," he whimpers, buttocks clenching because all he can think of is how Minho will feel so good inside him, and he will be so full; it will sting so good, just the way it has to, and he strokes his own cock as well, bucking into the touch.

They watch each other for a while, meeting in a kiss, though Seungmin's back is straining a bit and his thighs are trembling, seated on the counter on his ass. He gasps when he feels something prod against the skin next to his entrance.

Their foreheads are bumped together as they both look down the space between them, less distance there now as Minho lines his cock up to Seungmin’s welcoming entrance.

"Look," he says, voice hushed. "Look, Min," he whispers, kissing Seungmin on the cheek, looking down afterwards, and Seungmin shivers.

Minho tauntingly presses the fat cockhead against the skin between Seungmin's spread cheeks, tracing it around the stretched hole and over it, but never in, letting it catch on the rim. He clenches his fingers around the cockhead, stomach flexing, varying the pressure so that some more pre cum drips down and spreads along the pale skin before him, glistening slightly. "fuck," he whispers, adam's apple bobbing up and down. 

With his free hand, he reaches out to touch Seungmin's thigh, but Seungmin stops him, pushing the hand away. "No," he says, indulging them in a sloppy kiss with tongues pushing together. "No," he says when they draw back to get air. "No," he moans the syllable, shaking his head slowly. "Want you," he pleads. "Just you."

Minho wets his lips, staring into Seungmin's eyes now. "Okay," he says. "Okay," he breathes it out. He lines his cock up against the younger’s entrance again, and Seungmin's hips do a slight jerk, and he bites his lower lip.

The both of them are looking down between their bodies, watching as the cockhead presses against the rim, slowly breaking through as Minho leans into him. Seungmin's inhaling and exhaling speeds up a bit, and he lies down, back against the cold counter while he tugs in one of Minho's hands.

"Come closer," he says, toes curling around the edge of the desk when Minho obliges and leans over him, letting go of his cock since the head is pressed inside now. He adjusts his stance a bit, and one hand takes a hold of Seungmin's hip beneath the shirt, and the other leans on the counter to support the weight of his own torso. 

He starts pushing in and groans at the tight warmth surrounding him, how Seungmin's walls clench around him in response, and Seungmin lets out a soft whimper.

Minho looks down between them still, and so does Seungmin with an elbow propped onto the counter. They watch as Minho slowly disappears inside the other, and Seungmin's stomach and chest heaves up and down rapidly, though he tries to calm himself down.

"Minho," he says, tugging at Minho's wrist again. Minho finally gets the message, drawn out of his trance as he buries himself deep inside his brother.

He slides out again so that the cockhead catches on the rim, just to press in, in a taunting pace, a slick sound appearing from the motions. He starts fucking into Seungmin, thrusting his hips languidly even though his knuckles are whitening from the diminishing self control, from the way he wants to slam in and make Seungmin forget his own name and only remember Minho's.

Seungmin has propped himself down again, mouth parted and glossed with spit from the kissing. His breathing is mellow, cheeks painted with a light blush, hair disheveled and eyes crinkling at the corners for each time Minho thrusts in. Soft 'ah' and 'unf's bubble from his mouth, tears making his eyes glassy because it feels so, so good to have Minho finally inside him.

It takes a while before the pace speeds up, because they take their time, staring into each other's eyes, keeping the contact between them intact. Seungmin's body begins to rock back and forth against the desk once Minho's thrusting becomes a bit more definite, sharp draws of his hips sending Seungmin's voice hitching until it cracks over.

Minho makes a deep tune from somewhere in the back of his throat, grip on Seungmin's hip tightening as he heightens the pace and a sound of skin slapping against skin resounds in the kitchen, filling the silence of the house.

Seungmin has to clamp a hand over his own mouth to keep quiet, and Minho grits his teeth. 

His knees clack against the drawers beneath once he slams in, each motion done with added pressure until Seungmin's back is arching and his dick is bobbing against his stomach, thighs trembling.

Minho bites back a moan and suddenly leans a little back to take a hold of Seungmin's legs, hiking them over his own shoulders so that Seungmin's feet stick into the air, so that Minho has Seungmin's knees and start of his thighs on each side of his face. Minho slams in and bends Seungmin in half, pressing him against the furniture so that the bumps of Seungmin's spine scrape through the shirt and into the surface beneath him.

Minho fucks him until the both of them are out of breath, until Seungmin is letting out incoherent noises, tears streaking down the sides of his face and into his ears due to the position, gasping and whimpering.

It does not take long until a jittery feeling climbs up Minho's stomach. He frantically thrusts forward, searching and finding, and Seungmin is the one who comes first; back arched off the counter as he dirties his own shirt, face blissed out.

Minho finishes soon after with one last slam, grinding against the back of Seungmin's thighs as he comes deep inside him, moaning aloud even if it's risky.

They slump together there, and Minho carefully places Seungmin's legs down and drags him close, still inside him as he kisses him and hugs him, lifting him up into a sitting position again.

Seungmin is still a little sensitive from his orgasm, breath hitching and eyes wet, and Minho dries his eyes with the back of his hands, smudging the tear stains away.

"I love you," he says, cupping Seungmin's cheeks.

Seungmin opens his eyes, a vulnerable look splaying there. "I love you too," he shakily whispers.

They stay there for the next half hour; fitting together like a puzzle, clutching at each other, letting their breaths even out.

But Seungmin is still crying. Minho's eyes are bloodshot as well, nose becoming puffy as he fights against doing the same.

They hug each other close and link their pinky fingers in a promise that might've been hidden, but never forgotten.

They know they have to separate and go to their own rooms and sleep in their own beds.

They know that if they share a bed and wake up together the next morning, it will be found suspicious, underlying how wrong this is.

How wrong they are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking long with this. I was on vacation. And again, I'm sorry if there is any mistakes or errors, or missing words here. I'm going back on vacation tomorrow and I didn't want to leave without finishing it. PLEASE DO LET ME KNOW IF THERE ARE ANY ERRORS AND TYPOS, so I can fix them. Thank you so much for reading and I hope you liked the crappy ending. I LOVEYOU!


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